Farley's Castle

How do you post VHS tapes to Facebook? I have some great clips on VHS but I’m having trouble uploading them. Any ideas? 

Cruise Control- There is a switch, typically by the steering wheel, which allows the vehicle to maintain one steady speed. This is good not only for your miles per gallon, but also for the strain on your foot. So use it! 

Why do drivers of Subarus get into so many accidents? They literally have to make commercials to advertise their safety features… Why can’t they just learn how to drive? 

I was watching the news the other day and on came this add for a doll. The doll is a sweet, soft, talking doll. She will say eighteen of her many accounts! Your daughter and/or son (because it is 2016 we have to be politically correct) will truly enjoy this toy. What better to see then a warm smiling face in the morning! Also pull the cord and listen to the sweet sweet message she has to say! If you would like to buy one, the website is posted on the picture! 

(WARNING-WARNING: This message does not endorse any political party. We are not affiliated with any of the presendtial candidates- Donald Trump, Hillary Clinton or Gary Johnson)

I’m going to go open my own Drivers Education school. People on American roads cannot drive. I will have a few basic rules posted in the classroom. Here are some of Farley’s Castle Rules of the Road:

Left lane- This lane is for passing only. If you are going 15 mph under the speed limit then move. 

Posted speed signs- The speed posted, is the speed you go. You may exceed the speed to a reasonable amount. Do not go under the speed limit. 

Two lanes- If the street looks as if two cars can fit into the lane… Then two cars can fit into that lane. 

Family matters- Please do not stick your fake family in the back window of your car. Also if you stick them and it’s only you and a pet then you should rethink your life. 

Bumper stickers- Limit your bumpers stickers to a maximum of six. It is not the 90s anymore…shape up. (Yes six is high but I was only being reasonable) 

Political stickers- If your political bumper sticker is for a candidate that lost…then please remove it. If the sticker was for an election years and years ago…then please remove it. 

Texting and driving- I know you are important but put the phone down. Also for a computer…put it down and go to your Starbucks so you can try to look important there. 

• Thank you for reading some of Farley’s Castle Rules of the Road! More will be posted in the future! 

Nicole and I were driving the other day when she thought of something I deemed as blog worthy. We were talking about making a new tv show. It’s going be a sting type show called, “The Lady of the Night-Your Daughter.”  It’s going to be about parents finding their daughters working the street corner! It’s going to be the best show of the year!   

As you grow older there eventually comes a time when you have to decide whether you want to be cremated or buried. Now I know I am a young man so I have time to decide. However, I do not think I want to buried because what if I’m still alive?! I also don’t like the idea of being cremated because there is no where special that I want to be sprinkled and I don’t want to put into an urn. So I decided that if I die I would like to be stuffed. After I am stuffed, like a trophy, I want to be passed around amongst my family and friends. Everyone is entitled to have me for one day. I would also like to be dressed in a suit of knight armor but I know that might be too much to ask for! 

They have these ultrasound machines that deliver the “image” of the baby in 4D. There is a big difference between the 3D ultrasound and the 4D ultrasound. The 3D creates a three-dimensional image of your baby, while the 4D creates a live video. This is pretty interesting because you can actually see the face of your little baby! Now the 5D ultrasound creates a mold of your child and actually allows you to hold your unborn baby and the 6D ultrasound does your taxes. What will science come up with next?! 

My favorite show to watch is Wheel of Fortune. I have the spin ID number and I also applied to be a contestant! Almost every night at 6:30 pm I turn on the Wheel and eat my dinner.  One of the episodes that I was watching starred three married couples. After watching this episode I began to think of different types of couple contestants that could be on the show. My greatest idea was exes. They could be ex-husbands, ex-wives, ex-boyfriends or ex-girlfriends. Could you imagine how heated the show would get?! Only one person gets to say the letter/answer…I don’t see that working out well! It might turn into an episode of Jerry Springer! Instead of people saying, “Wheel of Fortune!” they will be saying, “Jerry! Jerry! Jerry!”

I always wanted to become a pilot. I mainly want to fly helicopters, but I would be alright with flying airplanes. I would have so much fun if I were a pilot. Before every flight I would walk onto the wing and pretend to duct tape it. I would make sure almost everyone saw me and then I would just wave. Could you imagine how many people would freak out?!